Cautious Hope

I have never been a fan of the Aquino Family . I wasn't born yet when the whole world mourned for Ninoy and the loss of democracy that he represented. I was too young to remember Cory's administration, but our history has not been good to her (rest her soul). Noy was an aging traditional politician or "tra-po" who wasn't exactly shaking things up in the political landscape. And Kris....well, the way she talks and the STD incident...let's just say she's not my favorite person in the world. This was how I felt two years ago before I left the Philippines. I am proud to be Pinoy but I had long ago given up on our corrupt and unjust society. I didn't believe the Philippines could ever be more than a series of government that mocks democracy by exploting its very own people. I had given up because I had hoped for a positive change, I strived for it ...but failed to effect that change. With the zeal and optimism that only youth can attain, I became active in a political organization in college (as far as political activism in my old college goes..which isn't much). But still...we had hoped to change things. When we couldn't bring about the change that we wanted, we bitterly gave up. I left thinking there was no hope for my country. However, hearing Noy's inaugural speech and a week into his presidency, I'm starting to feel a glimmer of hope once again. So far, he has kept his word. Most of all, he has made people want to change. I know he has his work cut out for him; he will make mistakes..lots of them. However, it is still ultimately up to us, the people, to effect the necessary changes that we want. Most don't believe they can make a difference because they expect grand changes in an instant. We can all start with the small stuff-- don't litter, don't jaywalk, don't cheat (even on an exam because that says a lot about your personal character), vote wisely, hold your elected officials accountable-- these are things even "ordinary" people can do. I will try to do my part, with a little less naivete and more action. With cautious hope, l will work for a better country.

Love Before Sight

When it came to the matters of the heart, I was pragmatic and even a little skeptical. It's not that I don't believe in love. I believe in its existence and its merit. Indeed, I'm a passionate advocate of it. It's just that my idea of it is not viewed through rose-colored glasses because I have seen how other people's notion of love has reduced their self-worth. For me, the use of the word "love" should not be taken lightly. Although I can undoubtedly say I have married the love of my life, I have never believed in love at first sight or any idealized, fairy-tale view of love.

However, on April 17, 2009, 24 minutes past 8 in the morning, I irrevocably and unconditionally fell in love at first sight. My husband and I had waited for months for him. But all the preparations, parenting classes, books, advice (some solicited, some not so welcome) had not prepared me for the overwhelming affinity, connection, attraction---Love-- towards this tiny, helpless being staring at me with unblinking eyes. My son had just been born. He welcomed the world quietly, smacking his lips from hunger and extending his right arm towards my face, as if he instinctively knew he would be taken care of. He couldn't have been more right. Come to think of it, it wasn't just love at first sight...I had loved him even before I saw him, after all. It was love before sight.

Even now, more than a year after that experience, I am still amazed how I could hold something so precious that has such a hold on me.